Everyone in Korea Must Visit Ulleung-do (Before it’s Too Late)

THE ANCIENT VOLCANIC SEDIMENT that rises up alongside Jeodeong’s coastal walkway is a reminder of how tiny and insignificant we are on, my God, this island alone, not to mention the world or its history. The bilingual leaflet that describes the island’s jagged edges is too overwhelmingly scientific to be educational to anyone without a degree in geology; we plebs have to settle for merely … Continue reading Everyone in Korea Must Visit Ulleung-do (Before it’s Too Late)

Shit Ain’t Right: A Polemic in Defense of Squatty-Potties

IN MY SCHOOL, the nearest boys’ bathroom offers two styles of toilet: one is a Western, “regular” style; the other, squat-style, common in Korea and across Asia. These two roads diverged in a white porcelain mark, for me at least, a significant leap in cultural immersion, and for weeks I wilfully ignored the issue altogether. I can’t remember the exact moment I lost my squatting-virginity—it … Continue reading Shit Ain’t Right: A Polemic in Defense of Squatty-Potties

Ways to Pass Time on a Train

I DON’T WANT TO COUNT the number of hours I’ve spent riding trains. More than I care to admit, though enough to brag about distances — 475 kilometers in Vietnam, over 600 in Thailand, not to mention that idiotically naive ride from Halifax to Toronto, nearly 1,000 in a single haul. I’m not sure why travellers love trains. They’re polarizing transport: whereas buses are almost … Continue reading Ways to Pass Time on a Train

Notes From a Mountain: Sleeping Beside the Loudest Snorer in South Korea

THERE’S LITTLE TO BE SAID about hiking in Korea that I haven’t before tried to write about; instead of struggling unprepared with my girlfriend in the bitter midwinter snow, this time we were four sweaty dudes in midsummer humidity suffering from sore feet and comically rosy sunburns. Our particular route up Jiri-san, South Korea’s second-tallest mountain, wasn’t actually very strenuous — but damned if it doesn’t … Continue reading Notes From a Mountain: Sleeping Beside the Loudest Snorer in South Korea

Tokyo, Japan: Impressions in 36 Hours

THERE IS SO MUCH already written about Tokyo, and so much more that needs to be, that my paltry two days (not even!) feel too preposterously short to scribble down anything that could meaningfully add to the canon of Tokyo lit. Who can know this city? The high-speed train plows on from Narita International, at least 90 minutes from the urban core; the outside cityscape … Continue reading Tokyo, Japan: Impressions in 36 Hours

Mad Man’s Travel Poem (With Courtesy to Sylvia Plath)

I shut my eyes and pray that Orbitz drops dead; I lift my lids and find that it remains. (I think I made it up inside my head.) Three thousand bucks? No cheaper fare instead? Like arbitrary numbers gallop in: I shut my eyes and pray that Orbitz drops dead.  What happened to two grand — that’s what you said! “That price no longer exists” — … Continue reading Mad Man’s Travel Poem (With Courtesy to Sylvia Plath)

Postcard from the Oriental Hotel: George Town, Then & Now

AN ISLAMIC NEIGHBOURHOOD was holding a garage sale in the middle of downtown George Town, Malaysia back in February. V and I spent close to 30 minutes rummaging through the stock, eventually leaving with just one item: a postcard of the very hotel we’d checked into the previous day, the Oriental. It was uncanny. I tried to take a replica shot, but the honking traffic … Continue reading Postcard from the Oriental Hotel: George Town, Then & Now

Notes from Namhae: Where Cabbies Refuse Our Money Because They’re Too Honest

NAMEHAE IS NOT DIFFICULT TO REACH, but once you’re in, it’s surprisingly difficult to get around. It is the kind of rural island where every day must feel like a weekend, where shop hours are unpredictable and if someone doesn’t know your first name they don’t know you at all. Taxis swarm the bus terminal but elude streets elsewhere, which is a problem because local … Continue reading Notes from Namhae: Where Cabbies Refuse Our Money Because They’re Too Honest

Finding the Bang in Bangkok

THE FIRST THING WE SAW WERE DILDOS. Racks of them. Dozens, even. Black and pink, dangerously large, hilariously small, all dangling in streetside tents. One vendor was spoke casually on his cell phone as he hung up his thick rubber cocks, getting an early 8 p.m. start for what he presumed would be a normal, meaning busy, Tuesday night. Patpong is filthy in every conceivable … Continue reading Finding the Bang in Bangkok